Tim Webster Finally Responds To Frenzal Rhomb's Questionable Ballad About Him

6 January 2023 | 4:26 pm | Dan Cribb
Originally Appeared In

You know, the one with the hook, “There's something wrong with your eyelids.”

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Australian TV and radio personality Tim Webster has finally responded to Frenzal Rhomb’s 1997 love letter to him, The Ballad Of Tim Webster.

You know, the one with the hook, “There's something wrong with your eyelids.

The track appears on the band’s iconic Meet The Family album, and 25 years later Webster has commented publicly about it, as shared by Frenzal.

Guitarist Lindsay McDougall shared the response, describing the track as “mostly complimentary but with a disproportionate focus on the then-sports broadcaster's eyes and more specifically eyelids”.

He added: “Wind forward 25 years and Tim Webster is hosting ABC overnights just before I come on air with summer breakfast. And he starts getting some texts about the song. To our knowledge Tim hasn't commented publicly about Frenzal Rhomb. Until now...”

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On his show, Webster commented: “Yes, they did do a song about me. What was it? I think it was called The Ballad Of Tim Webster by Frenzal Rhomb. I’ll try and find it… The line was, ‘There’s something wrong with his eyes.’”

McDougall texted in, with Webster thanking him and reading the message aloud: “We were young and stupid, but the song was meant as nothing but complimentary.”

Webster added: “I was actually quite chuffed by the whole thing.”

The song starts with a quote from Webster: “Time for our play of the day, and it's a case of being torn between two loves - an age-old problem: What comes first, the beer or the ball?

And ends with another: “Very politically incorrect, but very funny.”

And the tribute between those quotes reads:

You remind me of a God

You are my hero

An authority on all and sundry

It's remarkable your depth of knowledge

Something's wrong with your eyes

What are they protecting you from?

There's something wrong with your eyelids

You can listen to Webster’s response below.